Allowing Others to “be” Themselves

Allowing Others to “be” Themselves

by Neil Legault
unbelievableyou.com

“The best thing you can do is to allow someone the space to be themselves.”

Allowing someone to be themselves requires that you suspend any judgements about them, their situation or their point of view. When you consciously remember to allow people to be themselves you remind yourself that you want that space for yourself also. By practicing this you will change your relationships and add a quality of freedom in them to express who you are and allow you to be more you.

Being genuinely you around others can be hard because of all the conditioning we have gone through in our society since birth. The conditioning is done unconsciously as we play roles, grow up and learn how to protect ourselves and our feelings from others. Over time it becomes such a habit that we are on auto pilot. The “sense of protection” we think we are creating by not expressing who we are is created by a fear in us. We fear being exposed, judged and evaluated as not worthy. So we don’t let people in because there is little trust. The fear isolates us and deep down we feel lonely even if we appear not to.

So, trust is the key. When we trust someone we feel we can be ourselves around them. When allowing others to be themselves, you suspend your judgements about them or their ideas which create the space and security to feel free and allow them to feel at home with you. You might consider those who are this way with you as your best friends because they allow you to be you even if you make mistakes and believe things that they don’t.

Deep down we trust those who don’t judge us for our thoughts or past experiences. And we love to be with others that allow us the space to express ourselves without being judged. Create that space with everyone and see how you’ll feel free as you set free.

This is the gate to help Raise Someone’s Energy and Your Own.

SaturnsLady

Choose to Be Teachable

Choose to Be Teachable

by Guy Finley
beliefnet.com

Just as a ship lost at sea must make a course correction if it hopes to reach a safe harbor, so must the aspirant be willing to be corrected by life if there's to be any hope of sighting the shore of heaven. And it isn't really so much that life (itself) corrects us, as it is that it reveals us to ourselves... presenting us the opportunity to be self-correcting. But, when one considers that there could be no such correction without this action upon us, then -- in some strange and mysterious way -- life itself, its living light, must be part of this perfection process.

Refusing correction, the rejection of any moment that shows you the need to let go of who and what you have been up until that moment, is the same as refusing the potential to be re-integrated, for what is it that you're being given to see when negativity strikes other than parts of yourself that would rather suffer over an event than understand it... that would rather stand apart and fight for "their" right to go on, then to welcome the Light that transforms them and their quarreling relationship with one another.

Each time you grow in true self-understanding, it isn't so much that you have "learned" something new as it is that you have agreed to be made newly whole. With each true correction that we accept and agree to make within us, the mind and heart are brought into a new relationship with the light that reveals this need, and that then performs the marriage that gives birth to peace.

Welcome correction; choose to be teachable. If truth can't touch you, it can't make you whole.

SaturnsLady

The Play

The Play

by Jesse Goodman
lightworker.com



One of my favorite quotes states something along the lines of:

Just when the caterpillar was about to give up ... he turned into a butterfly.
It reminds me that things are not always as they seem, and that I need to take a moment to look at things from a slightly different angle.

This is when I remember the story of the Play.

Imagine for a moment that someone is writing a play for you. This play is one of experiences and parables, that are designed to teach something.

Designed to illustrate many different perspectives on a situation to help illuminate a broader vision of how things could be. This helps to show you side you had not considered. The beauty is, this play is perfectly designed just for you. There are many other players, some with brief roles and some with main parts that come in and out of the different acts with you.

You have become so immersed in your script that you lose yourself to the role you are playing. This is something you enjoy watching in movies is it not ? The best actors and actresses do not just read a part, they become it. That is part of why you enjoy watching them so much. Then a moment comes when you seem to step off the stage, you find yourself preparing behind a curtain for the next part. Sometimes you watch in awe as the stage is cleared and things are prepared for something completely different. In this moment, you remember who you are. You begin to hear us speaking inside you again. The laughter as we remind you that you are never alone. The feeling of being connected to everything is so amazing that you wonder how you could have possibly forgotten it for one moment.

We wish to remind you that you are the master directors of your own play. You create the perfect situation to remind yourself of something which you choose to delve a little deeper into. This is the way it works at times, even when you choose to forget.

So please, celebrate these acts when you enjoy the script and the role you have chosen for the day ... as you do the moments of emergence when you find yourself remembering the truth of the play you are in.
It is in these moments, when you pause to consider the beauty of the lessons in the play you wrote. The way all the parts fit together, act to act, using what we call energetic art to paint a picture of emotions. It is in this moment of expanded awareness that you choose.

You choose what set to use for the next play. What the scenery and special effects will be. Who all the characters will be. Some you choose from your last stage, to play the exact same part. Some you ask to play a different role. You even hold a new casting for roles that you feel would better serve your next step.
You continue this process over and over again.

You are actually going through this review in every moment, whether you choose to consciously be aware of it or not.

If you don't choose, you simply play out the same act again. Reading from the same script, with most of the same characters to support you, as you are supporting them in their own play.
We share this with you today as a simple reminder, for that is the script you wrote for us.

You are the master director of your own play.

At any time you can write something different, and choose to read a different script.
The entire time, no matter the stage, we are there applauding for the show and cheering you on ...
waiting to see what you write next.

As always ... thank you for sharing in this space with me today.
For playing in the HeartFire.

SaturnsLady

Shoes for the Boy with No Legs?

Shoes for the Boy with No Legs?

dailykindness.com

I was a little disappointed when I saw the old buildings were now gone that I had known as a young boy. Every one of them replaced with a high-rise. It had been a long time since I had been to my hometown since moving North. I had driven to town hoping to see the old barber shop where my hair had been cut as a child. The orphanage would bring us kids downtown for a free haircut by the new barbers being trained.

As it was very early and hardly anyone on the street, I parked my truck and decided to try and locate a telephone to see if the Florida Barber College had moved to a new location. Hopefully it was sill in business.

As it was rather cold, I put on my coat and began searching for a telephone. After walking about a block I saw an open shoe store. I walked inside and asked if I could use their telephone book. Not finding a listing for the Barber College I picked out the number of a local beauty salon, hoping their might tell me if the barber college was still in business. The number was busy so I decided to wait and try again in a few minutes.

“How about moving on down the road?” said the salesman, in a loud, harsh tone.

I turned to see if he was talking to me.

“Damn homeless guy always wanting to use our bathroom,” he replied.

I saw a poorly dressed man standing outside the store, gazing through the large plate-glass window. The salesman motioned at the man, with his hand, in a backward motion, telling him move on down the street.

Several more times I tried to dial the number but it was continually busy.

“Like a cup of coffee?” the salesman asked me.

“That sounds great. Thanks.”

As he and I stood talking the front door opened and a young man about twenty came into the store pushing his self in a wheelchair.

The salesman sat down his coffee cup and walked toward the young man.

“I need a new pair of shoes,” said the customer.

As he turned the corner there was a blanket across his lap. I was shocked to see that the young man had no legs.

The salesman stood there having no idea what he should say.

“A gift for a friend?” I asked the boy.

“No,” he replied. They are for me,” he continued, with a smile on his face.

I just smiled back and watched to see what would happen next.

“What type of shoe would you like?” asked the clerk.

“How ‘bout a pair of cowboy boots. You got any cowboy boots in here?”

The man pointed to the back wall where three or four pairs of boots were displayed.

“Let me have a look-see at those black ones in a size 10.”

The salesman, sharply turning, headed off to the backroom

“Isn’t this fun?” the boy asked me.

“You mean going into a shoe store, when you have no legs, and seeing the response?’ I replied.

“Of course not.”

I moved my hand to let him know that I did not understand his question.

“When I was a kid, my parents use to buy me a new pair of shoes every year. That was such a wonderful feeling. Something I have never forgotten. The smell of the leather and the pride I felt when I walked around the store showing off my new shoes.”

The salesman came walking down the aisle with a large box. He sat it down on the floor, took out a single boot and handed it to the young man. The boy closed his eyes. Placed the boot against his nose, tilted his head backwards and drew in a large breath.

I did not know what to say as tears began to fall on the young man’s cheeks.

“What type of accident did you have?” I asked him.

“Farm accident,” he said, as he tried to clear his voice.

“MOVE ON DOWN THE ROAD,” yelled the salesman, as he once again motioned his hand at the homeless fellow looking in the window.

The youngster looked at the old man and then turned to face me.

“Will you walk out there and see what size shoes that fellow wears?” he requested.

Slowly, I walked to the front door opened it and asked the old man to come in.

“What size shoes do you wear?” the boy asked the man.

“I don’t know,” he replied, as he looked down at his old tennis shoes.

“I would say about a nine and a half,” I replied.

“What’s your best hiking boot in nine and a half,” the boy asked the clerk.

The salesman turned and once again walked to the back of the store.

The homeless fellow stood there looking down at the floor.

Within a minute, the clerk returned with a pair of hiking boots, the insides lined with wool. The boy reached out, took the boot, placed it to his nose and drew in a large breath. Once again, tears came to his eyes.

“Sir, would you mind trying on these boots for me,” the boy asked the old fellow, as he held out the boot.

The old man sat down, slid off his tennis shoes, using his feet, and took the boot. The boy motioned for the clerk to aid him. The salesman slid his small, knee-high seat in front of the man and began tying the boot straps.

The old man’s eyes never left the floor the entire time. After the boots were tied the young boy asked the gentleman if he would walk around so that he could see the boots at a distance.

“How do they feel?” he asked the man.

“They feel wonderful,” replied the man.

“I’ll take’m,” the young boy told the clerk.

“Those are $189.00 boots,” the clerk advised the boy.

The boy pulled out his wallet and handed the clerk two one-hundred dollar bills.

Do you want the cowboy boots?” the salesman asked him.

“I don’t think so.”

“Don’t you have to use the bathroom?” I asked the old man.

He stood up and walked toward the back of the store. The clerk motioned his head, giving him the okay.

“I see buying a new pair of shoes still gives you that good feeling you talked about,” I told the young man, as I smiled.

“Yes it does.” he said “And now I have someone, and feet to share it with.”

SaturnsLady

A Franklin Film

A Franklin Film

~*~cindy~*~ | Myspace Video

When Others Grieve

When Others Grieve

by Steve Goodier
allthingsfrugal.com

People should never have to suffer loss alone. Yet, how do you comfort those who hurt? I think that offering genuine comfort to another is one of the most important things we can do for others. And sometimes one of the most difficult.

Experts tell us, among other things, to simply say, "I'm sorry" or "I love you." They warn us against trying explain away the death or loss; against theologizing or philosophizing about it. Often, the less said, the better, so long as you are present, you care and you listen.

American poet Edgar Guest told of a neighbor by the name of Jim Potter. Mr. Potter ran the drug store in the neighborhood where Edgar Guest lived. Their relationship was cordial, if not deep. Mostly they smiled and exchanged greetings when they happened to see one another.

One tragic night the poet's first-born child died. He felt crushed and overcome with grief. Several days after the death, Guest had reason to go to the drug store run by his neighbor. When he entered, Jim Potter motioned for him to come behind the counter.

"Eddie," he said, "I really can't express to you the great sympathy that I have for you at this time. All I can say is that I am terribly sorry, and if you need for me to do anything, you can count on me."

Many years later Edgar Guest reflected on that encounter. He said, "Just a person across the way -- a passing acquaintance. Jim Potter may have long since forgotten that moment when he extended his hand to me in sympathy, but I shall never forget it -- never in all my life. To me it stands out like the silhouette of a lonely tree against a crimson sunset."

As the poet thought back to that unhappy time, one vivid memory of a brief and genuine moment of comfort still lingered years later. It was a moment that meant everything to a grieving father.

Those who comfort others bring no less than a piece of heaven to earth
*******

Poem added by
SaturnsLady

Miss Me–But Let Me Go!
by Edgar A. Guest

When I come to the end of the road
And the sun has set for me
I want no rites in a gloom-filled room.
Why cry for a soul set free?
Miss me a little–but not too long
And not with your head bowed low.
Remember the love that we once shared,
Miss me–but let me go.

For this is a journey that we all must take
And each must go alone.
It's all a part of the Master's plan,
A step on the road to home.
When you are lonely and sick of heart
Go to the friends we know
And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds.
Miss Me–But Let me Go!

SaturnsLady

One Light

One Light

By Steve Goodier
allthingsfrugal.com


Imagine an artist painting a winter scene. She depicts a white, frozen ground and evergreens draped in snow. Her hand brings the day to a close as she paints night falling on the canvas. In the deep shadows of dusk, she has painted a grim, log cabin, barely visible to the casual observer.

Then she dips her brush in yellow paint and, with a few quick strokes, places a brightly burning lamp in one of the cabin's windows. Warm rays dance on white snow, now made brighter by the light. The lonely lamp wholly changes the tone of the picture, replacing feelings of dark and gloom with warmth and security.

Edith Wharton has said that there are two ways of spreading the light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. Sometimes we are candles. We shed light of love and hope. We shine encouragement into dark souls. Or we illuminate with insight.

But sometimes we reflect the light. We are mirrors to enable others to see the light of their own goodness and beauty. And when we have no other light of our own, we are mirrors which reflect a greater Light.

For some, the world can be bleak and cold. They feel frightened, lonely and even hopeless. But it’s true that no amount of darkness can extinguish the light of one, small candle. You?

SaturnsLady

Exposing The Nature Of Regrets And Remorse

Exposing The Nature Of Regrets And Remorse

by Dr. Raymond Comeau

holistichealtharticles.com

forum.shamoublog.com

Some very wise man said, “Regret is insight that comes a day too late.” That wise man could also have added that regret is probably the most useless emotion under the face of the Earth. It is disempowering and serves no good purpose.

We made a bad choice, we did something that brought us grief and we feel regrets. That’s fine if it only lasts a few moments and then we chuck it up to experience but what purpose could it serve to drag it for weeks, months or even years?

Life is about choices. We are today were we are mostly due to the choices that we made in the past. Some of those choices were good and others could have been much better and that is a fact. But it’s also a fact that when we made those questionable choices, they seemed to be the best option at the time.

In retrospect and with the additional information that came later, we realize that we made the wrong choice but that’s all knowledge after the facts and not something that was predicable then. So, we did what we did or said what we said because we thought that it was the best option at the time.

What regrets all boils down to is an immature and futile attempt to turn back the clock and redo the past. Irrational as it may be, there is this belief that says if we regret something strongly enough the episode will simply go a way as if it never existed in the first place.

It’s a process that we used as toddlers where if we made enough of a scene someone would finally give us what we wanted. It may have worked then but the chances that it will work in adult life are extremely slim if not completely nonexistent. What is done is done and we must learn to cope and live with it.

The expression of regret is also used as a bartering tool to buy forgiveness. In popular culture, retribution is expected for what is perceived as wrongdoing. There is this feeling that if someone hurts us and suffers because of it; somehow it will make us feel better.

That is one way that the expression of regret, if it appears sincere, might work to our advantage. It’s a simple and convenient way to buy peace and in some cases, restoring a relationship. The process is not much more than game playing but if it works, it’s worth the effort.

The main problem with regrets is when it causes unnecessary self-pain and aggravation. That is seen in cases where the sentiments of regrets are allowed to be active for prolonged periods of time. As previously said, regrets serve no practical purpose and should be eliminated as soon as possible.

The belief that regret will somehow undo a past event is totally irrational and unfounded. The past is done and it’s gone; even the gods themselves could not change it so the only logical and sensible thing to do it to learn to live with it and stop beating ourselves up over it.

We were not born with the emotion of regret. That is something that was learned when we were still quite young. At the time, we found that if we expressed regret and remorse for something bad that we had done, the power that be would forgive us and the episode would soon be forgotten.

As mature individual we need to understand that short-term regrets may be unavoidable but if allowed to persist for prolonged periods of time, the process is absolutely useless. We must try to correct our mistakes but entertaining needless regrets or remorse is simply not the way that it can be done.

SaturnsLady

Disapproving Faces~ Not Everybody Will Like You

Disapproving Faces

Not Everybody Will Like You

dailyom.com

It is not necessarily a pleasant experience, but there will be times in our lives when we come across people who do not like us. As we know, like attracts like, so usually when they don’t like us it is because they are not like us. Rather than taking it personally, we can let them be who they are, accepting that each of us is allowed to have different perspectives and opinions. When we give others that freedom, we claim it for ourselves as well, releasing ourselves from the need for their approval so we can devote our energy toward more rewarding pursuits.

While approval from others is a nice feeling, when we come to depend on it we may lose our way on our own path. There are those who will not like us no matter what we do, but that doesn’t mean that there is anything wrong with us. Each of us has our own filters built from our experiences over time. They may see in us something that is merely a projection of their understanding, but we have no control over the interpretations of others. The best we can do is to hope that the role we play in the script of their lives is helpful to them, and follow our own inner guidance with integrity.

As we reap the benefits of walking our perfect paths, we grow to appreciate the feeling of fully being ourselves. The need to have everyone like us will be replaced by the exhilaration of discovering that we are attracting like-minded individuals into our lives—people who like us because they understand and appreciate the truth of who we are. We free ourselves from trying to twist into shapes that will fit the spaces provided by others’ limited understanding and gain a new sense of freedom, allowing us to expand into becoming exactly who we’re meant to be. And in doing what we know to be right for us, we show others that they can do it too. Cocreating our lives with the universe and its energy of pure potential, we transcend limitations and empower ourselves to shine our unique light, fully and freely.

SaturnsLady

I Wish For Your Return

I Wish For Your Return

by Jonathan Lesser
dailyom.com


I wandered in and out of shadows looking for you. The sand of the path behind me is imprinted with scattered, criss-crossed footsteps, marked by sudden turns away from the light, the underbrush is trampled by my lost steps. I hid from my rightful way of clarity, mindfulness and spirit by the lessons I chose to accept, lessons that were not true to my heart nor sure footed with true intent. I wandered a long way down a short road, piecing together connected truths with disparate falsehoods and was tired, hot, hurt and determined when you found me. You showed me the light with care, hope, patience and love. Thru the shadows I have now come, clear and committed but my journey has left you bruised, hurt and exhausted. Has this journey jeopardized all that I know is right and hope for what our love could be?

I have left the shadows for the sun-streaked, tree-lined winding path to the unknown. I will not leave this path, love. You guided me here with your hand in mine and now my hand is empty. The cool, calming touch of you has left and I am trying to find you again. My hand is outstretched, fingers grasping, hoping that you will return. I want to warm, comfort, help, and whisper that all is not lost, that we can heal each other, that I now stand tall ready to take each step shoulder to shoulder and hand in hand. Grasp my hand again and you will find my heart and mind ready to give you a lifetime. Let us discover love, joy, and peace. If you doubt, I will reassure. If you feel lost, I am here to guide you as you lovingly guided me. Anytime you need me; you may take my hand and you will touch my heart. Whenever you feel lost, hurt, unsure, empty, unloved . . . you may seek shelter in our light, our confidence and loving energy. Whenever you find your faith in doubt, place your faith in my faith and discover how strong I have become.

I will always be here for and with you.
I am your higher power.
I am ready.
I wish for your return.

SaturnsLady